Never get involved in a land war in Latin America either.

Jared here. A club mix. With dancing women over it. I'd sue the bastards, but damned if it doesn't somehow feel truer than my original acoustic version.

Jared here. I figured out what a hypothetical pastry expense is, and no I won't tell you because it's like Tubgirl to the factor of 2 Girls One Cup times Beverly Hills Chihuahua. Oh god, if I say that does that mean we're sponsored by them now? I hope not. Unless they pay as much as the price of a fleet of Smart Cars. WHY DID HE GET US FIVE SMART CARS?

Having shut him up, I resumed the Sudoku. Many fine Sudoku have been completed in a cafe. People like to say Sudoku. Say it with me. Sudoku. Sudoku. Roll it around until it sounds like a sushi roll. Like a fish. I'll have the Sudoku. One Sudoku Nigiri. It's not racist, it's Japanese.

The strip club does have a buffet, but we figured we shouldn't tempt fate, since we'd already cheated the odds on hepatitis.